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Another spin on the Emerald Who’s Who Scam. This time they are pitching themselves as a business resource with a their own blog and everything.  Plus I can get a “free” ebook in exchange for a review of their organization on my blog. Well, I don’t think this was the blog they were talking about but fuck’em. So here’s my review ( my comments are in red)

Butler Clay,

(we have no idea who you are we just pulled this from the who’s is database or bought an email list)

As all business professionals we like to begin the new year with a clean slate and start doing things right, from the beginning. This is why I am  writing to you, to begin thinking about setting up for 2012. (When I say “I” and “writing” I mean our automated database churned out this email and auto inserted your name and a keyword or two off your website). We are a global online publishing and professionals networking organization (vanity publication run from a call center) for personal and business branding (ego stroking). We seek out individuals (Desperate individuals seeking validation from strangers) and organizations to represent the elite in the global business community (Not really, we just think that phrase sounds important. Basically, just give us money and we’ll print your name in a book that goes out to everyone else who paid to be in it. That’s it, that’s our only criteria. Money), and now we are looking for new professionals to work with in 2012!

We want to introduce you to our organization Emerald Who’s Who for Executives and Professionals, Inc. by offering you our complementary E-Book “How to Protect Your Business Reputation Online” in exchange for your review of our blog site, www.emeraldwhoswhonews.com (Here’s your review mother fucker!)

Based on information we were able to obtain, your association with, as in Capitola, CA perhaps will make you an ideal addition to the network for both the members and yourself. (Oops, our software sometimes fucks up the sentences. We have no idea what we mean by what was just written by our robots but our program bolded it as an important keyword you are supposed to notice.) After all it is who you know more so that what you know these days.

Please note, we will need your submission by February 13th. (Not really true. We’ll take your money anytime but we just want to create a sense of urgency) We wish you success in all your future endeavors, and look forward to including you and your business as part of our elite global professional networking organization.

With kind regards,

Anthony Miller

Research Department

Executives and Professionals, Inc.

208 East 51st Street, Suite 151

New York, NY 10022

Please reply to this email and place the word remove in the subject line should you no longer wish to receive email from us at this address.

I always thought I was a man, but the National Association of Professional Women  thinks otherwise. Whom am I to question authority? They are after all a national association who specializes in seeking out professional women – which I am now proud to say I am now one. I am a woman, hear me roar!

For the last year I’ve just been picking up the same old nomination announcements from the same old Who’s Who vanity directories. Boooring! But finally we have a new “playa” – The International Who’s Who Historical Society! Impressive isn’t it. Unlike most Who’s Who scams they’ve taken the time to eloquently explain what utter bullshit they are, that is if you know how to read between the lines. The best part? The book isn’t available publicly to protect member from being put on mailing lists! How rich! Fucking spammers.

Some of the highlights from their FAQ’s page. I’ve provided some clarification in (red parentheses).

Can I find your book/publication in my library or bookstore?
Our directories are strictly proprietary, for our member’s use only. We do not allow them to be in any library other than the Library of Congress. We do this to protect our members from being put on mailing lists and getting unsolicited phone calls.

(We don’t print this shit for free. It’s a vanity publication you dumb fuck. You pay to play.)

How did you get my name?
Your name was submitted to our organization in one of two ways. Our research staff may have chosen you as one of the best possible candidates by researching trade journals, business publications, and organizations like Dun & Bradstreet. We also send nomination forms to all of our members in their membership packages so they are provided with the opportunity to nominate anyone they feel would benefit from membership. We do not, however, keep any records as to the source of the nomination in an effort to avoid embarrassment to the candidate or nominating member in the event of a rejection of an application.

(We purchase email lists from shady Russians who have bots that scrape your emails off various publicly available sources. That why you’ll often receive multiple nominations, even to the email address you only use for PayPal. )

I have received this nomination letter and abbreviated biographical data form. What does it mean?
The letter you have received means that you have been referred to us as a potential candidate for inclusion in one of our professional business directories. The abbreviated biographical data form is an application to determine if you are eligible for inclusion. Upon receipt of your data form, our selection committee will review your application and if you are qualified for inclusion, we will contact you.

(It means we have your email address. We send millions of these out. We have no idea who the fuck you really are and we don’t care. Just sign up and pay us for the fucking book.)

Do I have to buy anything?
No, there is no cost or obligation for a free listing in our directory. Membership is completely voluntary. If you are accepted, you will be contacted regarding the outcome and given an opportunity to purchase the directory. Everyone who successfully completes the one-to-one interview with a Membership Selection Committee representative will be listed in the publication in our nonmember section.

(No, but if you don’t we’ll punish you by putting you name in super tiny print in the back of the book in our “non-members” section with all the other cheap bastards. This technically allows us to deny that this is a vanity publication.)

How much does the directory cost?
If you are interested in the directory, we have various publication programs depending on the membership package you select.

( The more you pay, the bigger your name bitch!)

Are you affiliated with any other Who’s Who?
Our publications are compiled and published by the International WHO’S WHO Historical Society. The titles currently compiled by our company include: International WHO’S WHO of Professionals; International WHO’S WHO of Professional Management; International WHO’S WHO of Entrepreneurs; International WHO’S WHO of Information Technology; International WHO’S WHO of Professional Educators WHO’S WHO of Professional Educators; International WHO’S WHO of Public Service; WHO’S WHO in California… We are not affiliated with any other Who’s Who organizations or titles.

(Fuck, better to ask what we DON’T publish. We use the shotgun approach. We discovered that there are desperate suckers seeking validation in a wide variety of professions.)

Oh and check it out. If you use the opt out email link, they expect you to fill in your email address! What total shits. Fuck them.

Dear Clay Butler:

On behalf of International WHO’S WHO of Professionals, I am pleased to inform you that you have been nominated as a candidate for inclusion in the 2011 Edition.  We congratulate you!  Nomination into WHO’S WHO is an honor in itself.

International WHO’S WHO has over 20,000 members in 154 countries worldwide and has been publishing biographies since 1928.  It is the most elite professional network in the world.  Our members assist each other daily with business and career opportunities.

It is in times like these that such a network is most valuable and we are seeing members help other members expand their businesses, find new positions, even relocate to another country.

If selected into WHO’S WHO, you will also be listed in the 2011 Edition of International WHO’S WHO of Professionals.  This is the definitive work on the world’s leaders in commerce, economics, policy, and trade.

We do require additional information to complete the selection process and we ask that you provide your biographical data by accessing the form on our website at:   http://www.internationalwhoswho.com/Nominations/FE2291C.aspx

Our editorial deadline is quickly approaching.  I urge you to act today.  If you delay, I cannot guarantee the committee will have ample time to review your submission.

Sincerely,
Terrence Leifheit
Chairman and CEO
2020 Pennsylvania Ave. N.W., PMB #504
Washington, D.C. 20006

P.S. There is no cost or obligation to be listed in the International WHO’S WHO of Professionals.  To ensure your biographical data is received in time, please complete this online form http://www.internationalwhoswho.com/Nominations/FE2291C.aspx by September 30, 2011. Upon review, our Membership Selection Committee will be in touch with you.

Members of our Board of Advisors include: Wallid Abdo, CEO, Eurobrokers-Greece; Michael Gondive, CEO, Eastern and Southern African Trade and Development Bank-Kenya; Fehmi Sami, Senior VP, Citibank, N.A.-Great Britain; Yusuf Alami, COO, Abdu Dhabi Investment Company-UAE; Mikhail Zaitsev, Finance Director, Volvo Car-Russia; DR. Jung Kook Paeng, CIO, Hyundai Motor Company, Korea; John Sai Chi Mak, Managing Director, Bulova Watch International, Ltd.-Hong Kong; and Aldo Castelli, President, Shell Brasil, Ltda.-Brazil

You have received this message because you are registered to receive messages from ProMarketing, 2406 King Drive, Papillion, NE 68046.

If you wish to unsubscribe from International WHO’S WHO of Professionals please click on the link below

http://www.internationalwhoswho.com/unsubscribe.aspx

They just keep coming don’t they? At least they got my name right. Unfortunately, they “did not receive your vital networking information” which is quite odd considering they searched the globe to find someone as distinguished as myself.

Dear Clay,

Recently you were selected as an inductee into the Distinguished Professionals Online Registry Among Executives. This selection was based on our research committees efforts to identify top professionals around the globe.

Click Here

Unfortunately, we did not receive your vital networking information. In the workplace it isn’t what you know, it’s who you know and who knows you. Social and business networking is the modern standard in developing relationships throughout the world. The potential for recognition and building networks within a community of 400,000 working professionals in numerous fields on a global scale is unlimited.
Consider this: if you make just one contact using the connections and visibility that Who’s Who provides, it will benefit you for a lifetime. As we are trying to build a comprehensive network of business professionals, there is no cost for your inclusion. Please click the link below to fill out your basic listing. Our community needs you as much as you need it.

It is professional, accomplished individuals like yourself that allows us to offer the visibility and advertising potential that we do. Again, we do require additional information to complete the selection process and kindly ask that you access this form on our website by clicking here.

Our registration deadline for 2011 candidates is June 30th, 2011. To ensure you are included, we must receive your verification on or before this date. On behalf of our Committee, I salute your achievement and welcome you to our association.

Sincerely,
Robert Patterson
Vice President, Research Division

Distinguished Professionals Online
26 Bond Street Westbury, NY 11542

Wow. Now they’re just naming who’s who directories after a dude’s first name. This prestigious scam, uh, I mean publication, has been around since June of 2010 so you they’re are the real deal. I’m also totally impressed with their use of  lowercase letters and reverse order for my name. Classy!

Dear butler clay,

Adam’s Who’s Who is recognizing you for possible inclusion in the 2011-2012 edition. Your invitation is the result of the success your organization has attained. Recognition of this kind is shared by thousands of excecutive women and men thoughout the United States and Canada. Adam’s Who’s Who acknowledges individuals for their achievements in their specific profession. Adam’s Who’s Who will be distinguished by being registered in The Library of Congress in Washington D.C. Since the inception of Adams Who’s Who there have never been any fees associated with individual’s appearance. Please go to www.adamswhoswho.com and click on the invitation button. To be removed please click on the button below and hit send. We wish you success on all of your current and future endeavors.

Thank You,

Editorial

Looks like Continental Broadcasting Network has a new URL. They were so darn impressed with me they sent me TWO announcements about my awesomeness! On the first one they  “announced your candidacy” and the second one, a day later, they were “alerted of your candidacy”. I’m so flattered! I can’t believe little ole’ me is getting this kind of….hey, wait a minute here.

C O N T I N E N T A L  B R O A D C A S T I N G   N E T W O R K   I N C.
If you do not wish to be notified Unsubscribe me from this list

April 18, 2011

Clay,

I am fortunate to bring to your attention that the publishing editors in our forum have announced your candidacy to be spotlighted as one of its professional executives.

This forum is reknowned by the upper echelon of Corporate America,  those who represent leadership and achievement in their industry or profession.

On behalf of everyone here, we wish you continued success.

view profile:

http://www.Clay.Butler.biographicnetwork.com

Carly Stevens
Member Services

23 Briaroot Drive Smithtown, NY 11787
T h i s  i s  a n  a d v e r t i s e m e n t

————————————————————————————————————————————————————————-

C O N T I N E N T A L  B R O A D C A S T I N G   N E T W O R K   I N C.
If you do not wish to be notified Unsubscribe me from this list

April 19, 2011

Welcome,

It is with great pride that I bring to your attention that the publishing editors within our ranks have alerted us of your candidacy.

This forum is reknowned by those who represent leadership and achievement in their industry or profession; Spotlighting professionals and executives throughout the upper echelon of Corporate America.

On behalf of everyone here, we wish you continued success.

view profile:

http://www.biographicnetwork.com

Cynthia Carrington
Member Services

23 Briaroot Drive Smithtown, NY 11787
T h i s  i s  a n  a d v e r t i s e m e n t

Looks like the Montclair Who’s Who of Photography scam has a competitor! The coolest part is “know someone interested in this email” forward suggestion at bottom. Sure, we’re not picky, send us everyone you know. As long as they pony up the cash and got a $75 point and shoot from BestBuy, they’re in dude!

Who’s Who in Digital Photography

Dear Photography Professional,
You have been elected to represent your specialty in our upcoming registry. This notable accolade can improve your marketability and exposure for future business.
The 2011/2012 edition of the “Who’s Who In Digital Photography” registry will include biographies of America’s top photographers. Recognition of this kind is shared each year by members from across the globe. It is often considered the single highest mark of achievement.
Upon confirmation of your inclusion, you will be listed alongside other professionals in The Who’s Who Registry. There is no cost to participate.
If you are interested in being reviewed, click here. Take thirty seconds to fill out your basic information.
If you have any questions call our staff at 877-936-4577.
Sincerely,
Diane Franklin Esq.
Senior Managing Director
245 Park Ave
New York, NY 10167
Who’s Who In Digital Photography
Copyright 2011. All Rights Reserved.
Dear Photography Professional,

You have been elected to represent your specialty in our upcoming registry. This notable accolade can improve your marketability and exposure for future business.

The 2011/2012 edition of the “Who’s Who In Digital Photography” registry will include biographies of premier photographers. Recognition of this kind is shared each year by members from across the globe. It is often considered the single highest mark of achievement.

Upon confirmation of your inclusion, you will be listed alongside other professionals in The Who’s Who Registry. There is no cost to participate.

If you are interested in being reviewed, click here.

button.png

Take thirty seconds to fill out your basic information.

If you have any questions call our staff at 877-936-4577.

Sincerely,
Diane Franklin Esq.
Senior Managing Director
245 Park Ave
New York, NY 10167
Who’s Who In Digital Photography
Copyright 2011. All Rights Reserved.

Featured members

Stanley H. Kaplan – Founder of Stanley Kaplan Test Preparation Centers

Herbert T. Hoover – Univ. of South Dakota/Professor of History

Forward to a friend
Know someone who might be interested in the email? Why not forward this email to them.
Unsubscribe
Don’t want to receive these emails any more. Please Unsubscribe me from this list.

Hell yes! Just when I was feeling like 2011 would be another year without the much deserved recognition I am so rightly entitled too, Biltmore Who’s Who saves the day. Finally some appreciation  from someone who understands my brilliance and will authenticate my status as one of the finest professionals in the world. I even got my masters in professionalism. That’s how prestigious and professional I am. That’s pretty fucking professional if you ask me.

Dear CLAY BUTLER,

You were selected to represent the business and professional community in CAPITOLA, CA in the 2010 Edition of Who’s Who Among Executives and Professionals.

This upcoming national hardcover registry and website directory from Biltmore Who’s Who will be published the 2nd quarter of 2011. Industry experts and clients alike are helping to identify the finest professionals throughout the world.

Our goal is to recognize individuals for their commitment to and influence in your industry. There is no fee to be listed.

Our Registry confirmation deadline for December candidates is December 30th, 2010. If you are interested in being a part of our national publication, click below to respond.

Empowering Executives & Professionals, The networking possibilities are endless.
EMPOWERING EXECUTIVES & PROFESSIONALS
Empowering Executives & Professionals
The networking possibilities are endless, empowering executives & professionals
4601 Sheridan Street | STE 500 | Hollywood, FL 33021

This offer is brought to you by Infogroup.
To unsubscribe please use this link to remove your subscription.
View our Privacy Policy here.

Pay Us Hundreds of Dollars to See Your Name in a Book That Only Goes Out to the Other People Dumb Enough to Pay to Have Their Name in the Book – It’s a Directory for Suckers Just Like You
Come Join Our Who’s Who Scam

This in another version of this business registry scam. The terms of service are identical  but they’ve changed their URL. You can view the PDF contract here. Here’s an excerpt of their ridiculous pricing model. They emphasize at the top of the offer that “Updating is Free!”. Then in tiny print at the bottom it explains how they really intend to fuck you over. That’s right, the cost provisions are in the fine print. Bastards.

I HEREBY ORDER A SUBSCRIPTION WITH SERVICE PROVIDER EU BUSINESS SERVICES LTD “EUROPE BUSINESS GUIDE”. I WILL HAVE AN INSERTION TO ITS DATA BASE FOR THREE YEARS. THE PRICE PER YEAR IS EURO 990. THE SUBSCRIPTION WILL BE AUTOMATICALLY EXTENDED EVERY YEAR FOR ANOTHER YEAR, UNLESS SPECIFIC WRITTEN NOTICE IS RECEIVED BY THE SERVICE PROVIDER OR THE SUBSCRIBER TWO MONTHS BEFORE THE EXPIRATION OF THE SUBSCRIPTION.

Ladies and Gentlemen.

In order to have your company inserted in the registry of World Businesses
for 2011/2012 edition, please print, complete and submit the attached
form (PDF file) to the following address:

Europe Business Guide
P.O. BOX 2021
3500 GA, UTRECHT
THE NETHERLANDS

email: register@ebg2011online.com
fax: +31 (20) 524-8107

Updating is free of charge!

If you are not the intended recipient, please submit an email to
unsubscribe@ebg2011online.com
Your request shall be dealt with accordingly.

Message ID: Voxoulrayp

Even Thunderbird thought this was a scam and it doesn’t even have a brain. Shame on any humans who actually falls for this bullshit.

C O N T I N E N T A L  B R O A D C A S T I N G   N E T W O R K   I N C.

Clay,

It is with great distinction that I inform you that as of July 27, 2010, you are requested to be debuted in the 2011 directory showcasing the WHO’S WHO of Worldclass business leaders.

Our forum is renowned by professionals and executives who express continuous knowledge, experience and achievement in their industry or profession.

On behalf of our members and staff, we wish you continued success.

Check In here to view profile:

http://www.Clay.Butler.cbrnbio.com

After you emend your profile, find out Who’s Missing.

John Preston
Vice President Member Services

Who’s Who World Class Alliance
23 Briaroot Drive
Smithtown, NY 11787

I so stoked that my nomination is for the hardcover edition. That would definitely be more prestigious and appropriate for my  current standing as an accomplished individual than say the soft cover or saddle stitched version.

Dear Clay,

You were recently chosen as a potential candidate to represent your professional community in the 2010/2011 International Association of Business Leaders Hardcover Registry.

This one is interesting because they use a a big JPG image to present the information and uses gibberish in the HTML to get past the spam filters. Oh Canterbury, what a clever scoundrel you are! You can check out their application form in this handy PDF file.

First the image…

Now the hidden HTML text:

Invitation to Canterbury Who's Who

update your e-mail settings

opt out here

canterbury who's who

image needs to be turned on

for complete offer and contact info

Send looked blue gave for home.
Paper region egg piece effect govern.
Through black spend while pound tiny.
Among chick worry poor answecry.
Mine hit cough late stick step sshall son.

Something job across must stone remain figure.
Baby instrument certain event knew wild engine school.
Matter one method loud case race.
Process plan locate village.

Box avoid road cough sun.
Better catch green search bread together.
Cold father helped wait thing supply would.

Back reflect hurt steel.
Hold valley cloud probable depend remain cover.
Called energy equate start ease.
Belong land will when jump too.

Describe verb fall material letter.
Turned melody clear vowel will.
Short why term it fit operate.

Here’s the deal. “Updating” may be free but the directory is not. In the tiniest of fine print they casually mention this will cost you 980 British Pounds per year! Worse yet, it’s a three year contract.  If you’ve filled this out already and sent it in and then they start harassing you for payment, blow them off. They are crooks so expect some threats but they will never follow through because they are crooks and know they are operating unethically if not flat out illegally. Here’s the PDF file they send with the email.

Dear Madam/Sir,

In order to have your company registered in the World Business
Directory for 2010/2011, please print, complete and return the
enclosed form (PDF file) to the following address:

World Business Directory
Suite 149 - Rosden House - 372 Old Street
EC1V 9AU / London - United Kingdom
E-mail: office@companyworld2010.com
Fax: +44 207 806 8157

Updating is free of charge!

To unsubscribe, please send an email to
unsubscribe@companyworld2010.com

Wow! I was formally approved on January 1st 2010. I loved the use of italics on the word approved. It’s as if they are subconsciously trying to tell me there are scamming me. Plus Emerald is a way dumb name. The others scam who’s who’s have much more impressive sounding names. Not impressed!

Dear Clay,

You were recently chosen as a potential candidate to represent your professional community in the 2010 Edition of Emerald Who’s Who.

We are please to inform you that your candidacy was formally approved January 1st, 2010. Congratulations.

The Publishing Committee selected you as a potential candidate based not only upon your current standing, but focusing as well on criteria from executive and professional directories, associations, and trade journals. Given your background, the Director believes your profile makes a fitting addition to our publication.

There is no fee nor obligation to be listed. As we are working off of secondary sources, we must receive verification from you that your profile is accurate. After receiving verification, we will validate your registry listing within seven business days.

Once finalized, your listing will share prominent registry space with thousands of fellow accomplished individuals across the globe, each representing accomplishment within their own geographical area.

To verify your profile and accept the candidacy, please visit here. Our registration deadline for this year’s candidates is January 1, 2010. To ensure you are included, we must receive your verification on or before this date. On behalf of our Committee I salute your achievement and welcome you to our association.

Sincerely,
John Franklin
Vice President, Research Division

Emerald Who’s Who
954 3rd Ave, Suite 817
New York, NY 10022-2013

I’m the king of the who’s who! Got four of these today to four different email address – none of which have anything to do with photography. Shame on them and their scam and doubly shame on the people who brag about getting this fake award.

Who’s Who in North American Photography (2010/2011 Edition) Dear Photography Professional, It is my pleasure to inform you that you are being considered for inclusion in: The 2010/2011 edition of the registry will include biographies of North America’s most accomplished photography Professionals. Recognition of this kind is an honor shared each year by our members from across the United States and Canada, and is often considered to be the single highest mark of achievement. Upon final confirmation of your inclusion, you will be listed alongside other professionals of equal caliber in the Montclair Who’s Who Registry. There is no cost to be included. If you are interested in being a part of our national publication click here or on the yellow button below and spend thirty seconds filling out your basic application.   If you have any questions feel free to call our staff at 800-405-7090. Or please visit our site, - for additional information.   Regaurds, Caroline Greenstein Editor-In-Chief Montclair Publishing LLC

Yeah baby, you know you want a piece of this action!

Clay,

You were recently chosen as a potential candidate to represent your professional community in the 2010 Edition of Who’s Who among Executives and Professionals.

We are please to inform you that your candidacy was formally approved December 4th, 2009. Congratulations!

The Publishing Committee selected you as a potential candidate based not only upon your current standing, but focusing as well on criteria from executive and professional directories, associations, and trade journals. Given your background, the Director believes your profile makes a fitting addition to our publication.

There is no fee nor obligation to be listed. As we are working off of secondary sources, we must receive verification from you that your profile is accurate. After receiving verification, we will validate your registry listing within seven business days.

Once finalized, your listing will share prominent registry space with thousands of fellow accomplished individuals across the globe, each representing accomplishment within their own geographical area.

To verify your profile and accept the candidacy, please visit here. Our registration deadline for this selection period is December 31, 2009. To ensure you are included, we must receive your verification on or before this date. On behalf of our Committee I salute your achievement and welcome you to our association.

Sincerely Yours,

Chris Jespersen
Nomination Committee Secretary
Who’s Who among Executives and Professionals
2631 Merrick Road, Ste 203
Long Island City, NY 11101

Confidentiality Notice: This e-mail communication and any attachments may contain confidential and privileged information for the use of the designated recipients named above. If you are not the intended recipient, you are hereby notified that you have received this communication in error and that any review, disclosure, dissemination, distribution or copying of it or its contents is prohibited. If you have received this communication in error, please delete the communication and unsubscribe from the mailing using the options available in this email.

We only support ethical email marketing. To remove yourself from future mailings, please visit here to use our automated removal system. You will be removed from our mailing database within seven (7) days. 11701

Fuck this. I’m too important to be lumped in with cooks, nurses and especially crafters.

Heritage Who’s Who really does have exceptional taste.

It is my pleasure to inform you that you are being considered for inclusion into the 2009-2010 Heritage Who’s Who of Business Leaders and Professionals registry. Your reported accolades have earned you special recognition in the special Honors section of the registry.

The 2009-2010 edition of the registry will include biographies of the world’s most accomplished individuals. Recognition of this kind is an honor shared by thousands of executives and professionals throughout the world each year.

You may access our application form using the following link:

http://www.heritagewhoswhoform.net

Upon final confirmation, you will be listed among other accomplished individuals in the Heritage Who’s Who Registry.

Due to strict publication deadlines, we request you complete your application and return it to us by Friday, September 16th in order to be included in our next wave of approvals. Your swift response is appreciated and ensures you are prominently included in our 2009-2010 registry.

There is no cost to be included in the registry.

If you’ve already received this email from us, I apologize for the duplication; there is no need to respond again. This email serves as our final invitation to potential members who have not yet responded.

On behalf of the Executive Publisher, we wish you continued success.

Sincerely,
Chris Jespersen

Managing Director
The Heritage Who’s Who

Wow. Just when you think you’ve seen it all. This is just pure cheese. And WTF is “Chart and Graph Design”? Oh wait, yes that’s one of the keyword combinations on my website. How thoughtful of them!

I am pleased to announce that Clay Butler has been selected for the 2009 Best of Santa Cruz Award in the Chart & Graph Design category by the US Commerce Association.

In recognition of your achievement, a 2009 Best of Santa Cruz Award has been designed for display at your place of business. You may arrange to have your award sent directly to Clay Butler by following the simple steps on the 2009 Best of Santa Cruz Award order form. Simply copy and paste this link into your browser to receive your award:

http://www.uscommerceassociation.com/A5BBN-7TFL

Each year, the US Commerce Association (USCA) identifies companies that we believe have achieved exceptional marketing success in their local community and business category. These are local companies that enhance the positive image of small business through service to their customers and community.

Also, a copy of the press release publicizing the selection of Clay Butler has been posted on our website. The USCA hereby grants Clay Butler a non-exclusive, royalty-free license to use, reproduce, distribute, and display this press release in any media formats and through any media channels.

An Award Code has been assigned to your company that can be used on our website for quick access to your award information and press release.

Your Award Code is: 5BBN-7TFL

Sincerely,

Kelly McCartney
Board Of Review
US Commerce Association

I’m worried that I may be spreading myself too thin here. What if I become even more awesome and famous through my numerous Who’s Who nominations than I already am? I’m not sure if I want people pointing and saying things like “there’s that super rad guy I saw in all those Who’s Who books!” I value my privacy!

It is my pleasure to inform you that on August 31st, 2009 your information was reviewed and accepted for inclusion in the 2009/2010 edition of our Registry.

Presidential Who’s Who, each year, recognizes and selects key executives, professionals and organizations in all disciplines and industries for outstanding business and professional achievements.

This recognition is shared by those who have reached a distinguished level of success in their chosen profession.

Please take a moment to complete the invitation by clicking on the link below. We ask that you complete it carefully, as it will be reviewed by our editorial department.

http://www.formdesk.com/pgn/Presidential

As a reminder, Presidential Who’s Who is pleased to inform you that there are no fees or dues to be included in the publication.

On behalf of the CEO and our esteemed staff, we wish you continued success.
Sincerely,

MarkAnthony McGuiness
Chief Operations Officer

Presidential Who’s Who
134 Rockaway Avenue FL2
Valley Stream, NY 11580

Please complete the online link by September 30th, 2009.

I’m so fucking awesome I can’t stand it! It’s like I have the Midas touch or something!

Congratulations!

It is my pleasure to inform you that on April 20th, 2009 your information was reviewed for inclusion in the 2009/2010 edition of America’s registry.

America’s Registry each year, recognizes and selects key executives, professionals and organizations in all disciplines and industries for outstanding business and professional achievements.

As a leader in your field, America’s Registry gives you the type of national recognition not found anywhere else. People may join memberships, societies and organizations to develop business contacts, thus gaining credibility and/or exposure for themselves and their organization. As a powerful third party endorsement, America’s Registry offers this kind of recognition for individuals on a national basis with the added benefit of instantaneous networking with the other members.

This recognition is shared by those who have reached a distinguished level of success in their chosen profession.

Please take a moment to complete the invitation by clicking on the link below. We ask that you complete it carefully, as it will be reviewed by our editorial department.

http://www.whoswhoregistry.net

** Please complete the online link by May 30th.

America’s Registry is pleased to inform you that there are NO fees or dues to be included in the publication.

On behalf of our board of directors and our esteemed staff, we wish you continued success.

Sincerely,
Robert Hopkins
VP – Research Division

America’s Registry
26 Bond St.
Westbury NY 11590
Phone: (516) 333-8450

Holy cow! I’m going Global. I had no idea I was so well respected in my profession!

It is my pleasure to inform you that on April 3rd, 2009 your information was reviewed and accepted for inclusion in the 2009/2010 edition of our registry.

The Global Directory of Whos Who each year, recognizes and selects key executives, professionals and organizations in all disciplines and industries for outstanding business and professional achievements.

This recognition is shared by those who have reached a distinguished level of success in their chosen profession.

Please take a moment to complete the invitation by clicking on the link below. We ask that you complete it carefully, as it will be reviewed by our editorial department.

http://www.formdesk.com/pgn/GDW

** Please complete the online link by May 5th.

The Global Directory of Whos Who is pleased to inform you that there are no fees or dues to be included in the publication.

On behalf of the publishing department and our esteemed staff, we wish you continued success.

Sincerely,

John Franklin
Vice President, Research Division
The Global Directory of Who’s Who
4250 Veterans Highway, Suite 2050
Holbrook, NY 11741, USA
Phone: (631) 588-8600

If I was the Global Whos Who Directory I’d sue these guys for copyright infringement. Fucking thieves. Definitely not joining their group!

It is my pleasure to inform you that on April 20th, 2009 your information was reviewed and accepted for inclusion in the 2009 edition of our registry.

Strathmore’s Whos Who each year, recognizes and selects key executives, professionals and organizations in all disciplines and industries for outstanding business and professional achievements.

This recognition is shared by those who have reached a distinguished level of success in their chosen profession.

Please take a moment to complete the invitation by clicking on the link below. We ask that you complete it carefully, as it will be reviewed by our editorial department.

www.strathmorewwonlineform.net

** Please complete the online link by April 30th.

Strathmore’s Whos Who is pleased to inform you that there are no fees or dues to be included in the publication.

On behalf of the CEO and our esteemed staff, we wish you continued success.

Sincerely,

J.M. Blakely
Vice President, Research Division

Strathmore’s Whos Who
26 Bond St.
Westbury NY 11590
Phone: 516-997-2525

Yeah, I’m doing pretty good.

It is my pleasure to inform you that you are being considered for inclusion into the 2009-2010 Princeton Premier Business Leaders and Professionals Honors Edition section of the registry.

The 2009-2010 edition of the registry will include biographies of the world’s most accomplished individuals. Recognition of this kind is an honor shared by thousands of executives and professionals throughout the world each year. Inclusion is considered by many as the single highest mark of achievement.

You may access our application form using the following link:

http://tinyurl.com/5f93rw

Upon final confirmation, you will be listed among other accomplished individuals in the Princeton Premier Registry.

For accuracy and publication deadlines, please complete your application form and return it to us within five business days.

There is no cost to be included in the registry.

If you’ve already received this email from us, there is no need to respond again.

This email serves as our final invitation to potential members who have not yet responded.

On behalf of the Executive Publisher, we wish you continued success.

Sincerely,

Jason Harris

Managing Director

Princeton Premier

I’m so special, so, so, special!

Continental Who’s Who

October 23rd, 2008 PassCode: 637148

Welcome to our Inner Circle.

We believe that your accomplishments as a respected professional in your area, merit earnest and intense consideration for inclusion

Our referral based program enables you to be reached by hundreds and thousands of professionals and your peers.

Our organization recognizes men and women who have achieved success in their respective fields. Continental WHO’S WHO is used as an outstanding professional resource throughout the World, providing a forum for consulting, exposure and credibility.

To show our appreciation, all applicants will receive the Syndicator eMagazine Internet Business Edition

Visit us at the address below enter your passcode and acquaint us with your History.http://www.cwwinnercircleform.com

We look forward to your reply.

Very truly yours,

George Malone

P.S. We are proud to invite you to our consortium.